When the gchat notification sounds became frequent enough to interrupt her Soundcloud stream, Isis switched tabs to see who was chatting her, guessing it would be her boss which turned out to be a good guess. She explained what she had already explained in the group email that morning, and her boss said "fantastic isis" after saying a couple of other things without pressing enter so that Isis found herself staring at the words "Dimitri is typing..." for longer than she felt justified her boss's terse verbiage. Her eyes witnessed the digital clock in the right hand corner of the screen switch from 4:59 to 5:00, which she attributed to her unique ability to sense the digital world through her fingertips, and she cursed both the fact that electromagnetic radiation made her physically ill and that she didn't work a 9 to 5 but instead worked a 9 to 6 and still had an hour left at her job, which was annoying both because it meant she worked 260 more hours, or 10.83 more days a year than 9-to-5ers did, and that when she complained/boasted about having a grown-up-9-to-5 job she couldn't stop herself from adding that, well actually, she worked 9 to 6, not 9 to 5, so it was even worse in her case, and that the usual response was that that was the norm these days.

    Isis reached into the leather bag her mom bought her four years ago when her mom had hoped she would be "on solid ground" enough to land 9-to-5, necessitating a non-backpack-type laptop bag suitable for the office environment. She pulled out one capsule of Nordic Naturals Ultimate Omega, the #1-selling omega-3 in the U.S., offering concentrated levels of omega-3s for high-intensity essential fatty acid support which can also be used to treat electromagnetic hypersensitivity, looked at her coworker Laurel long enough for Laurel to look back at her, and slowly put the capsule on her tongue. She had been thinking during the past several days that it could be beneficial to her for the office to think she was either taking care of her body and her health and thus her life by treating herself to niche supplements, or that she was either well off enough or fucked up enough to need some sort of mood stabilizers that her therapist suggested she take despite Isis being insistent about the dangers and hidden agendas of the pharmaceutical industry, or "big pharma" as she like to put it to signify she was well-read on the subject.

    By the time it was 5:30, it had already been three and a half hours since Isis had detoxed in the Clearlight Infrared™ sauna that she specifically tried to get a job near, since the Clearlight Infrared™ sauna, the ONLY infared sauna that cancels out both Electromagnetic Fields (EMF) and Extremly Low Frequencies (ELF) to levels 5 x below the threshold of concern, are uncommon, but there were a few gyms that had them in Manhattan, and one of them was literally three doors down from the office building where she worked. Isis left the office usually twice daily for 30 minutes sessions to sit naked in the sauna, as recommended, and she assumed no one from the office really noticed her unreasonably sweaty body when she returned, due to the constant film of coconut oil that sat on the surface of her skin which she used as an EMF barrier and that made her, at all times, pretty glossy. She figured she would have to wait it out until she got off at 6 to go to the sauna, but then by that point, would most likely not go because it would be too crowded by then.

    Isis opened and then closed Instagram on her phone twice consecutively, a habit formed probably from being addicted to memes but also having electromagnetic hypersensitivity. Oil was beginning to bead up and harden around the edges of her Phone Dock/Protector combo phone case, which provides the strongest protection against EMF radiation for the human body and can come in any color in smooth heart shaped designs, and she wondered weather her headaches were increasing because the case was becoming weak in its old age of 1 year, which in tech years is more like 8.

    After eventually leaving work and doing some other things, Isis debated weather to drink her cold pressed juice in the bathtub while she soaked, because she felt she needed to take advantage of the enzymes in the juice while they were still alive and valuable but also feared the proximity of the hot bath water to the plastic cup could potentially release BPA and other harmful toxins into her juice and thus her body, or "flesh prison" as Isis saw others refer to it on the internet, which reminded her to remember to say "flesh prison" out loud at some point in the office. 

    Isis poured Piping Rock Kaolin Powder, clinically proven to pull toxins out of the body and suitable all skin types, and Nature's Way Alive! Vitamin C Powder, which protects the body from potentially harmful free-radicals and reduces chlorine levels from tap water, into her bathwater and inhaled deeply while thinking "I'm breathing deliberately" as she lowered herself into the water, which had been filtered by CuZn Water Systems Bath Ball Faucet Filter, which allows you to prevent this nasty chemical (chlorine) from negatively affecting your body chemistry by simply attaching it under the tub faucet. She thought about how closing her eyes was a good way to relax while she closed her eyes, before opening them after several seconds or maybe a minute, defeated by the self-imposed pressure to not think about anything specific while her eyes were closed. When she opened her eyelids, she realized she had left her cold pressed juice out of reach from the tub, never having fully committed to a decision about whether or not to drink it while bathing. Isis felt relief in realizing that her decision had been decided for her, or not decided for her exactly since no one else had decided it, but instead had become something similar to a fact.

    After soaking long enough to assume she had sweated enough toxins out of her body, which she'd read on various blogs would take 15 to 20 minutes, she toweled off, walked into her bedroom, turned on her Ionic Crystals Natural Salt Lamp, a natural way to cleanse the air of negative ions and improve indoor air quality, and laid down on her bed to post a Facebook status update. She spent almost 40 minutes finding the perfect image to accompany "tfw you tell ur doctor ur allergic to wifi" but then deleted it knowing someone would comment in a way that called her out for being a kind of oxymoron. After that and some other things, Isis ordered Seamless and plucked her eyebrows.

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