Grief Care

Circles of Grief

Imagine our life is a circle. When someone close dies, our life becomes completely shaded by our grief.


In those first weeks or months, even years, the loss and grief can magnify everything and impact upon us in so many ways.

When bereaved we can believe that, over time, our grief will shrink, and become something we can manage: a smaller part of our life. We don’t usually think it will go away completely – after all, we don’t want to forget those who have died (or resolve issues why we may want to forget). We are built for grief and can manage this intense human experience. We do it in our own personal way with the support of others who validate our unique reactions & responses.

But something else happens. As time goes by, life happens, situations come along, and our life grows around our grief. We find ourselves taking pleasure in things and feeling enthusiasm for life again. It’s not that we “get over” our grief or that we have forgotten those who have died, or even that they become less important to us. It’s more that their life and death become part of who we are.

Most days, we can manage our loss and grief in bereavement, but there are still times when a photograph, a smell, a song or an anniversary can remind us of our loss. We find ourselves back in the pain of loss and grief. This can happen five months, five years or even fifty years after the death, and is a natural response. That pain is still there if we really want to think about it; that special place in our hearts is still there, it hasn’t changed. In fact, our need for connection grow stronger.

What helps us with this view of grief (and it does not fit everyone) is that it reduces our expectation that our grief should largely go away. Often, we have a sense of disloyalty to those who have died, about carrying on with our lives and we get stuck or feel held back. We still grieve the loss while at the same time continuing our own lives. It explains the dark days, the not so dark days and also the depth the grief that has given our lives. It shows how we ‘grow new life’ in living with grief and continuing our bonds with those who have died. Grief stays and our life grows around it.


If you have any questions or would like to talk to one of our bereavement consultants about your own experiences of grief and loss, please don’t hesitate to contact us. We are here to listen! 

Death does not end the story. Death does not end a relationship


During bereavement, we unpack the relationship with someone who has died
and explore what that relationship meant for us
and can still mean for us.

Bereavement is a time we can relearn and learn more about our relationships
with those who have died.

Our relationships can be transformed in death.

“Life is changed not ended
Death does not end our story…

Death does not end our relationships"

'An opportunity for men to gather in a safe space
to connect with other men and share
their experience of grief and bereavement

Meet at:  St Mary's Presbytery
21 Swanson Street, Erskineville

Tuesday 18 June 2019
7.00pm till 8.30pm

For all enquiries and RSVP contact Paul on 0425 282 938 or

Sponsored by Bereavement Pastoral Care Team
  For urgent help or information call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Beyondblue on 1300 22 4636.
Copyright © 2019 Bereavment Support Catholic Cemeteries & Crematoria, All rights reserved.

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