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Why Is Everybody Fighting (Again)?

Howdy, hi, hello. Welcome to Engine Failure, a culture newsletter that dives into what the fuck is really going on in Formula 1. It’s written by me, Lily Herman.

Greetings, fellow flesh orbs on this hurtling space rock! EF is out late because, well, life, work, and health issues happen. (Luckily, I’m doing better on the health front and have found a new normal with my professional responsibilities after undergoing a big shift.) Also, approximately 80% of the driver and WAGs grids dropped big news over the last 10 days, so it took a while to catch up and figure out what to say. Fun stuff. I have enough content to spread over this issue and a subsequent bonus issue, but we’ll see how everything pans out this week. We'll be back to normal early next week too.

Anyway, I don’t have much to say in terms of an intro (other than to sign up for the EF Patreon, where I had a lot of fun talking about sponcon with Nadia El Ferdaoussi), so let’s dive in!

Let’s Talk About All of the ~Access~ Drama for a Sec

Over the past month, there’ve been three F1 media access-related incidents that’ve come up. I’ll preface this by saying that I believe all of them are somewhat silly for very different reasons, but let’s go through them anyway:

1. There was a Twitter-related scuffle earlier in October stemming from the fact that Pit Stop, a podcast consisting of two men who are self-proclaimed F1 newbies, gets all sorts of access to F1 drivers, team principals, and other important members of the sport for their programming while simultaneously getting a lot of facts about the Formula 1 wrong. Meanwhile, women, people of color, and LGBTQIA+ creators are often harassed for similar lapses and aren’t given anything close to the red carpet that’s been rolled out for these two lads to the F1 paddock.

In this case, I have less to say about Pit Stop itself (it's a symptom of a larger problem, in my opinion) and more commentary on the well-known male commentators and podcasters who defended the program's admission to the upper echelons of the sport and tried to deflect valid criticism around media access and inclusion in F1. But we’ll wade into that at a later date.

2. More recently, F1 presenter Will Buxton set off a whole other kerfuffle when he said Brad Pitt wasn’t allowed to talk to commentators (more specifically, him) during the U.S. Grand Prix. Sky Sports' Martin Brundle then popped in to say that this wasn’t the case, and now I’m left wondering if this is how Willy B. learned that only he was barred from talking to certain celebrities. Awwwwwkward if so…

3. Unfolding this week, Max Verstappen, Christian Horner, and the Red Bull team are boycotting talking to Sky Sports (and that appears to, at least for now, include several different countries’ Sky Sports franchises) over commentator Ted Kravitz saying that Lewis Hamilton was robbed of an eighth world championship in 2021. Now a bunch of British journalists and presenters are closing ranks around Kravtiz and dropping mad tea. (Are you sighing loudly and taking a long sip of your coconut vanilla matcha? I sure am.)

To be completely frank, none of these individual spectacles point to anything new, and they sure aren’t Formula 1-specific (or sports-specific) problems. I do think they’re worth addressing at large though; for those who don’t follow me on Twitter and Instagram, I’ve mentioned before that I’m putting together a bigger piece that I’ll send during the off-season on this question of access in the F1 paddock that seems to come up every five seconds.

I’ve got about 1,000 words of notes already together, but seeing as it’s a pretty nuanced discussion, I’d rather deliver it on my own time instead of trying to respond to whichever person (well, man) is Upset™ on the internet at the moment. The annoying dudes of F1 and their foolish drama do not dictate my schedule.

However, I’m finally ready to talk about a Brad Pitt-related thing, so let's move on.

Uh, Yeah, I’m Over the Brad Pitt Worship

Much of the past 10 days have been spent thinking about Brad Pitt, a person and concept I would prefer not to ruminate on, but here we are.

I’ll readily admit that I’ve never been a fan of Brad Pitt. Maybe it’s just my ace brain, but after spending my childhood and early adolescence being told by every American tabloid just how desirable I was supposed to find him, I’d concluded long ago that he's simply mid. (And yes, I've seen quite a few of his movies. I've done my research! I tried!)

I haven’t had to think about Brad Pitt too much on the actual film front recently, but Formula 1 decided it was of the utmost importance that everybody know that William Bradley Pitt himself was everywhere at the U.S. Grand Prix.

At its core, this Austin-based race is about uncritical European stereotypes of America. That’s why it’s all cowboy hats and horses and banjos. I’d argue, however, that the sport’s media obsession with Brad Pitt over the weekend is a product of that — an idea of what outsiders believe this country loves as opposed to what’s actually going on.

For those who haven’t been keeping up with Brad Pitt in 2022, some shit is definitely going down. On top of trying to sell his production company amid rumors that he’s dealing with cash-flow problems, more details came out at the start of October about the alleged abuse that ex-wife Angelina Jolie and their children suffered at the hands of Pitt during that ill-fated 2016 plane ride. In response, BP has been on a PR tear for the past four months or so, including debuting unnecessary and ultra-pricey cashmere and genderless skincare lines, completely changing his sartorial direction for his Bullet Train press, launching a sculpture collection in Finland, and taking part in short-lived, publicity-driven rumors that he was dating model Emily Ratajkowski. Anne Helen Petersen, one of my favorite American cultural commentators, eloquently wrote about the “sad smut” associated with Pitt’s brand, and Vulture’s Angelica Jade Bastién followed it up with a sprawling tale of the PR and career journeys of Pitt and Jolie. I certainly wouldn’t argue that Pitt isn’t Famous™, because that’d be ridiculous; I’d say, however, that his cultural relevance in the U.S. is at an interesting inflection point. (It reminds me of this recent article about how Gen Z girlies don’t actually find Leonardo DiCaprio all that hot and don’t get why everybody’s fighting to date him.)

But despite all of these obvious red flags, it looked like the Formula 1 apparatus was operating under a very 2005 idea that we, as an audience (particularly those of us who are American), care deeply about Brad Pitt. Practically every driver, WAG, and team showed off photos of Pitt with them and around their garages. He was also, as I noted above, the source of a whole debacle for Will Buxton.

To be frank, it just didn’t quite sit all that well in my gut. This is a man very much using Formula 1 as part of his current crisis PR efforts, and the sport embraced it handily. As for Brad Pitt himself, he wasn’t necessarily there because of a deep, lifelong, abiding love of Formula 1 but because he’s going to star in an F1-related movie in the near-future. Lewis Hamilton, as we’ve previously discussed, is an executive producer on the project.

Let’s switch gears to Lewis now. Last week, Sir LH announced that he was launching his own film and TV production company called Dawn Apollo Films, which will produce this Brad Pitt outfit as well as that documentary on Lewis’ own life. It’s no secret that Lewis is mesmerized by celebrity culture, particularly the American-grown 2000s Hollywood kind; much as Daniel Ricciardo loves Hollywood too, Lewis counts people like Anna Wintour and Tom Brady among his close friends. (I don’t even have the energy to get into either of those relationships right now.)

As much as I appreciate all that Lewis has done for F1, his proud association with the likes of Brad Pitt as well as questionable Scientologist Tom Cruise (whom I’ve long said I worry is trying to convert Lewis) are troubling. As we see Lewis continue to transition away from Formula 1-related stuff over the next season or two into his post-F1 life, it’ll become a harder battle for him to figure out who he wants to associate with.

We’ll get into some of this celebrity stuff when we talk about F1 access in a few weeks. But the marketing in general for F1 — and in this case, how it specifically wants to reach American fans and what it deems “important” about America to a global audience — is tired.

A Not-So-Quick Word About Our Fish Guy™ Logan Sargeant

Folks, it looks like I’ll be in a state of agita for the foreseeable future, because barring cataclysmic events in Formula 2 (we’ll get to that!!!!), it appears that next year Logan Sargeant will be the first full-time American F1 driver in a decade and a half — and the first American to drive in an F1 race in over seven years.

In addition to my many missives, I wrote back in August about the weirdness of Logan’s family background and his alleged political leanings heading into his potential first season of Formula 1. To summarize: That shit is wild as fuck.

However, the debate I’ve heard the most about Logan is how much we should bring his family — and all of their political and personal drama — into the mix when talking about him, his racing career, his politics, and his future in the sports. Whew, I’ve got thoughts:

1. Some of this discourse over the past three months has leaned into this idea that Logan is young and therefore we should leave him alone. Folks, the man is almost 22 years old. While he’s certainly a young adult, he’s not a minor, and at this point, he’s very aware of what he’s getting into as part of the F1 grid. Some folks need to stop infantilizing him and let his actions and words be up for thoughtful critique.

2. There seems to be this strange idea among a few people that it’s sacrilegious to talk about Logan’s family or his connections to the people who raised him when discussing his entrance to the sport. Folks, in the words of Abbott Elementary’s Barbara Howard, sweet baby Jesus and the grown one too! Not only is every driver’s family a massive topic of conversation when discussing how he got into F1 (hello, privilege!), but Logan’s entire racing career was built off of family money that was made at least partially through bribing foreign officials for business. By his own admission, Logan wouldn't have even made it to Formula 2 at all if Williams hadn’t swooped in because his family had just lost a ton of money. Not to mention, Logan’s racing funds were discussed in the case.

I have no doubt that Logan has seen Some Shit™ growing up in a family that’s been taking each other to court for decades; that would definitely do a number on anyone, and for that, I have a great deal of empathy. However, this idea that we shouldn’t bring up Logan’s family in talking about how or why he’s even eligible to be in F1 is ridiculous. Besides, it’s honestly probably one of the most interesting things about him. (We’ll get to my other favorite new Logan fact a little further down.)

3. As far as Logan’s politics go, there’s not too much to say at this point. We’ve discussed the singular altered Instagram caption that’s been at the center of debate, and it appears that Logan may have un-liked a few spicier items on Twitter (though he’s still got a like on this Jake Paul/Elon Musk tweet, which is…hmmm). Generally speaking, he’s kept his public channels relatively racing-focused. As for his Instagram, he’s largely following driving-related folks as well as hot models. I can’t fault him for the latter.

4. Speaking to the above point, I went through about two years’ worth of things Logan Sargeant has “liked” on Twitter, and here’s one interesting theme: The man strangely loves inspirational tweets from Steve Harvey. I think this is probably, without a doubt, the most endearing thing I’ve learned about Logan in the past 14 months of closely following his career. (Also, does this mean Logan is a Family Feud fan? And what did he think of Harvey’s disastrous 2015 Miss Universe gaffe? Paddock journalists, I hope y’all are taking notes. I’m doing your job for you! Ask him about this — and credit me, of course!)

Annnnd let’s finish up with a quick aside on Logan’s wild F2 ride. I won’t lie to you: I’m kind of worried about Logan having a bad last race weekend in Abu Dhabi, mostly because I can’t believe Williams doesn’t have a serious Plan B if he doesn’t get his super license.

I’m not exactly sure why Williams is making this sound like such a done deal. After all, Logan has had six retirements in F2 this year (more than anyone on the grid), and five of those have come since July. In fact, Logan hasn’t had a clean race weekend since the Austrian round earlier that month. The fight for P3 through P7 in the championship is separated by only 12 points. And then there was the FP1 debacle in Mexico last weekend that caused him to miss out on another super license point.

Obviously Logan is talented, and many of these retirements weren’t directly his fault. Regardless, there’s still a very small chance that Logan’s bad luck continues with his final F2 race weekend and it fucks with this super license business. I’ll be nervous until we see the final results.

I’m not sure how to feel; the chaos muppet in me wants whatever is the most dramatic outcome, and yet I think him getting on the F1 grid would be its own form of pandemonium.

Kelly Really Wants to Chat About Brazilian Politics

Max Verstappen's girlfriend Kelly Piquet really can’t just let us be, can she? Last month, she began posting a series of anti-Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva posts ahead of the upcoming second round of Brazil’s presidential election.

Kelly has very randomly entered the political fray online over the past several months. While she never said anything specifically about her father in the aftermath of him calling Lewis Hamilton an anti-Black slur several times, she did like an Instagram post where her uncle tried to justify using the N-word. A few weeks later in late June, she came out as pro-choice (though specifically not pro-abortion) in the wake of the U.S. Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade. We hadn’t heard from her on the political front again until now.

To be clear, she’s been very careful in her latest series of posts not to paint herself as pro-Bolsonaro so much as anti-da Silva. (Which, I mean, eeeeeeehhhh. Sure.) But that doesn’t mean she’s avoided controversy. Not only have their been some rumblings in the comments of her posts as a result, but a few things have also popped up on occasion in Max Verstappen’s IG comments demanding that he answer for what Kelly posts. (Again I say, eeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhh.)

Kelly kept it relatively subdued after Bolsonaro lost to da Silva last weekend, only posting a Martha Medeiros quote about coming together as a nation. But seeing as F1 is headed to Brazil next weekend and there've already been some potential issues, this is where the internet and reality meet.

Another group affected by Kelly’s posting: WAG fan accounts. Quite a few of them have gotten flack from followers for continuing to post about Kelly without mentioning her beliefs or what she’s putting on the internet. It’s gotten to a point where several of these Instagram profiles have issued statements around the matter, claiming that they’re just there to neutrally post WAG outfits and sightings and nothing more. It once again sets up an interesting question we’ve seen play out in other realms: Are these fan accounts really just covering Kelly like everyone else, or are they giving a platform — without any form of context or disclosure — to someone with potentially harmful views?

Is Max Verstappen’s Love Language Physical Touch?

Speaking of Max, I’m formally putting forth a theory I originally floated on Instagram Stories: I really believe his love language is physical touch.

I was stunned after seeing a random video clip somewhere of the utterly deep bear hug he gave to Nyck de Vries (another lover of embraces) shortly after his F1 debut at Monza. But after seeing more photos of Max's hugs over the last few weeks, I’m convinced that this man loves physical affection. (Is it a PR move along with all of the smiley Max photos we got mid-season? Probably. Am I still fascinated? Yes.)

There are people in this world who hug, and then there are people who embrace. Max is 100% the latter. He stretches those arms around his target and appears to do a little squeeze too. But here’s the most important question I have: Who taught him how to hug like this? It certainly couldn’t have been Jos, right?

A Rare Hanna Prater Sighting

Folks, it’s been literally years since Sebastian Vettel’s wife Hanna Prater has been photographed with her consent during an F1 weekend, but we finally got a pic. (She’s on the far left next to Seb.) 

To be clear, the Vettel fam has attended GPs incredibly covertly recently, and the Aston Martin team and F1 apparatus at large have been very careful to let them maintain their privacy. Considering she’s in a photo with a number of people (including her husband) and it was posted on a podcaster's public profile, it’s safe to say she knew this would see the light of day. Everybody welcome Hanna to EF! This is probably the only time I’ll ever really mention her!

Like what you see? Check out other recent Engine Failure issues, check out the EF website, join EF’s Patreon, and then forward this newsletter to a friend because you're a nice person who wants to see me ~succeed~:

And if you have tips, suggestions, theories, intel, gossip, or questions, tweet me, send me an email, or use EF’s anonymous tip box.

I had a whole different Unofficial Ranking slated for today (it’ll go in the next issue, don’t worry) until Friend of the Sleutheria (and sister of Abigail of F1 surfer rankings fame) Meredith slid into my DMs with a wild suggestion: “Sorting F1 drivers into ‘sexy baby’ and ‘monster on the hill.’”

For those of you who are like, “What the fuck does that even mean?”, the phrases come from Taylor Swift’s song “Anti-Hero” off of her newly released record Midnights. (Side bar, but thanks to some help from my former F1 Biddies group chat, I matched all of the 2021 drivers with Taylor Swift songs last November if you want to take a look.)

The full “Anti-Hero” verse:

Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby,
And I'm a monster on the hill.
Too big to hang out,
Slowly lurching toward your favorite city,
Pierced through the heart but never killed.

The lyrics (and their inspiration) have been hotly debated ever since the album came out. And to be clear, TSwift is far from the only person to talk about this phenomenon; it’s been around for decades.

However, Meredith got me thinking: Who are the sexy babies and monsters on the hill within the F1 grid? I got her selections and also scribbled my own thoughts: 

Sexy Baby

  • Max Verstappen: I asked my Mexico City GP watch party how they felt about Max in this regard, and there were lots of mixed responses as to if he was a sexy baby or the monster on the hill. It was divisive AF, but I’m putting him here for now. That said, I will happily accept dissertation-sized rants for or against this positioning.

  • Charles Leclerc: I think everyone was in agreement that Charles had a bit of a baby face, but that's different than being a ~sexy baby~. Still, I think it fits in an odd way.

  • Lando Norris: This was probably one of the easiest selections. No discussion necessary.

  • Daniel Ricciardo: Here’s the thing: Going along with my theory about Danny Ric having a bit of Peter Pan syndrome, I think he badly wants to still be a sexy baby but is actually a monster on the hill. He’s just in denial about it and I don’t want to further hurt his feelings, so I’m putting him here for his ego. (The man is about to leave F1 for at least a year! He doesn't need more pain!)

  • Mick Schumacher: The guy is called Baby Schumi by a big part of the fanbase. Need I say more?

  • Yuki Tsunoda: No comment necessary.

  • Zhou Guanyu: I think I put Zhou here because he’s def not in the monster phase but isn’t necessarily a question mark. We’ll let him stay here for now!

Monster on the Hill

  • Fernando Alonso: Fernando could’ve written “Anti-Hero” himself tbh.

  • Sergio Perez: Do I really need to say anything?

  • Lewis Hamilton: Again, this seems obvious.

  • Sebastian Vettel: Yeeeeep.

  • Valtteri Bottas: I feel like Val still low-key wishes he was a sexy baby, but my man is a monster on the hill.

  • Kevin Magnussen: LMAO.

  • Nicholas Latifi: I mean…

The Lingering Questions

A few drivers were really on the fence and thus open to more interpretation:

  • George Russell: Meredith and I were both stumped by where to put George. He doesn’t necessarily act like a sexy baby, but he’s not necessarily a monster on the hill quite yet — though he desperately wants to be.

  • Carlos Sainz: I honestly don’t know, though I'm leaning towards monster. I feel like some of these drivers who are in their mid- to late twenties are a little more difficult to figure out. I feel like Ferrari’s shady Instagram admin is certainly making this man a monster on the hill though.

  • Lance Stroll: I don’t think he’s either one.

  • Esteban Ocon: Probably a combo of both???

  • Pierre Gasly: Pierre would be very upset if I didn’t call him sexy (even if the context didn’t make sense), and I think his recent Slut Summer™ renaissance is making the case. That said, he’s def harnessing “monster on the hill” energy slowly but surely.

  • Alex Albon: I feel inclined to put him in the “monster on the hill” category, but something is stopping me, and I can’t put my finger on what.

While people sometimes send me their thoughts on Unofficial Rankings from time to time, I rarely ever publish them. However, because I know there’s quite a bit of F1/Swifties crossover, if you want to make a specific case for a driver and where he should sit on this sexy baby/monster on the hill matrix, feel free to email me. I’ll print responses with a first name or pseudonym (up to you).

As many longtime readers of EF will know, I’ve historically been a big fan of Isa Hernáez’s wardrobe. Out of any of the WAGs, her style most often resembles my own (or rather, my aspirational fashion self), and I like the small peeks she gives into her life as a rich lady in Spain.

However, we’ve seen an interesting shift in the past four months or so: Isa’s doing a lot of sponcon, comped services, and gifted content on her Instagram. In fact, on many days, it’s all she posts, and at this juncture, it feels like she’s reached a tipping point in terms of going from a woman who occasionally does Notable Social Media Person™ stuff to a full-blown influencer — and is perhaps doing a little too much.

While I wouldn’t say this has made me dislike Isa by any stretch, I’m certainly not as interested in what she’s posting since it’s likely something related to a brand. It’s an odd push-and-pull: I like seeing which companies are reaching out to her and how she’s dealing with that, but I also wish we saw a little more about just her again. I'm certainly curious to see how this develops over the off-season and what her following looks like heading into 2023.

Lewis has had a relatively subdued sartorial end to the season, which is in direct opposition to the Reputation Era energy he brought to his wardrobe at the start. Nothing he’s worn over the last few race weekends has been atrocious, but it also hasn’t been especially inspired. It just feels like some of the same ol’ stuff. But hey, at least he’s sticking to what he knows, and I'm not mad about it. That amoeba hat was a rough time for us all.
Elsewhere on the grid, I’ve loved Zhou Guanyu’s recent style, particularly his ensemble for the U.S. Grand Prix. The man has a serious appreciation for American culture that goes beyond using very shallow stereotypes, and I loved see what he wore. (Also, not enough is said about Zhou’s sunglasses game!)

More than a few folks have DM’d me with an important question: What on Earth happened to Nadine Merabi, the designer who seemed to be hitting up every F1 WAG and commentator in the span of a few weeks over the summer?

Do not fret: She and her array of rhinestones and feathers are still around. In fact, she recently held a fashion show in mid-October, where Sky Sports presenter Naomi Schiff was in attendance. Fellow Sky Sports presenter Natalie Pinkham wore an NM ensemble recently too. It looks like her efforts to become the go-to designer for the WAGs didn’t work out though; not a single one of them has been seen rocking NM publicly this fall so far.

Over on the WAGs side of things, I’ve noticed an interesting phenomenon: Quite a few of them have been avoiding cameras at races. That’s not necessarily a bad thing (and they’re very much entitled to do so!), but it’s a trend I’m keeping an eye on as we round out this season and begin again next year. 

For example, we saw a little less of Kelly than we often do over these past few weeks, and even Isa went a little more undetected day to day. These two matter in the sense that they’re definitely trying to be influencers; proximity to F1 is part of their appeal, even if someone like Isa rarely talks about her partner on her Instagram.

VB went on a bit of a press run in October. More significantly, now that Val is officially a sponsored Canyon athlete, he sat down with the brand for a chat about getting into cycling through Tiff, his upcoming gravel race, and his love of Strava. Over on the American media side of things, he talked to Kevin Clark for a sec over at The Ringer.

Compatriots on this Carlos Sainz Denim Watch journey, I feel like I’ve almost given up on this man. I’m at the end of my rope! I cannot save this lil’ pants trollop from himself!!!!!

Let’s recap: The U.S. Grand Prix looked like it was going to be a fantastic time. The sun was shining! A record number of spectators were attending! Celebrities whom I like better than Brad Pitt were there! And then all of a sudden, everything was ruined in an instant when Carlos hopped out of his little Ferrarimobile wearing baggy light-wash denim — which he proceeded to wear all weekend.

Y’all know was transpired: The man landed on pole only to be taken out of the race in the first turn. I know the George Russell haters say it’s his fault, but I don’t know y’all; this Grand Prix makes a compelling case for the pants.

And then onto the Mexico City Grand Prix: I knew we were off to a bad start when Carlos showed up in black pants for the first time in the two-year history of The Watch. He switched over to what may be navy chinos (this is up for debate) on race day — and then he proceeded to be so far behind that he could’ve probably been lapped by Max Verstappen if the race had gone on a little longer.

I only have one rhetorical question after these massive pants-related debacles: Will I ever know peace?

No, motorcore fashion inspired by F1 can’t be a thing! Is F1 working on its own all-women feeder series? Formula 1 drivers as capybaras. Pierre Gasly went live on Twitch and gave some tea that people translated from French. Checo Perez is looking for “good crazy.” Could Juri Vips and Marcus Armstrong make the IndyCar jump? Carlos is besties with everybody. I still don’t get what this Mercedes girlboss thing is. George Russell describes a meme. Is this the greatest Max Verstappen photo ever? The F1 grid as High School Musical songs. Netflix talked to a bunch of F1 fans. Actually cute Formula 1 wallpapers, parts 1 and 2. Bono is a Jay-Z fan. F1 is facing legal challenges over its Bahrain contract. Ten things Lando Norris can’t live without. Oh, and here’s Lando answering fan Qs. The 1959 USGP was a mess. IndyCar drivers as Pokemon. Checo Perez is a commercial star. F1 Arcade??? IndyCar’s Pato O’Ward fought for a contract extension — and got one. Lmaaaoooo, a new Haas sponsor. We finally have clips from Lando’s ex Luisa’s radio interview. Alex Palou is feelin’ mighty optimistic. Daniel Ricciardo does another lil’ chat. Lewis took a ride in a fighter jet. George looks a little different. Rookie Season seems interesting. My professional and personal interests collided. How much game do F1 drivers have? Slandering every F1 champion from 1950 to present. The USGP from six different perspectives. Leadership lessons from Toto Wolff. You can call him DJ Lando. Isa got an ELLE Spain write-up. Jean Todt’s impressive watch collection is up for auction. ESPN’s new F1 deal is confirmed. The Las Vegas GP is gonna be more expensive than Monaco.

Thank you to everyone who wrote into last issue’s Conspiracy Corner question: The FIA says that Red Bull Racing is guilty of a “minor overspend breach” in regards to F1’s cost cap budget. Aside from the catering rumors, what did Red Bull’s F1 team spend too much money on and why? (Wrong answers only!)

Y’all are a bunch of Chatty Cathies (and as always, this is just a fraction of responses):

  • Erin: A Toto voodoo doll for Christian.

  • Manvi: Carte Blanq on the "33 Max Verstappen" song. That tune is SO catchy it can convert Red Bull conspiracy theorists to fans.

  • Lindsey: Upgrades to Max's AI personality generator.

  • Ingrid: Max’s laundry. I just hope his mom isn’t doing it anymore (as he admitted in DTS!!!), and we all know he’s not doing it himself.

  • Timothy: Red Bull accountants believed that Helmut's dungeon he keeps the Red Bull junior drivers in was covered by the exception for top execs' salaries. The FIA disagreed and counted it against the overall budget.

  • Julia: Adrian Newey's notebooks and paper for his printed emails.

  • Ppya: It’s either Ubers to pick up Max from petrol stations where Jos has left him after races where he doesn’t win or ribbons for Geri’s horse.

  • Lindsay: Paying for the dry-cleaning bill required to keep Geraldine Horner’s “White Clothes Only” wardrobe crisp and pristine.

  • Claudia: Intricate locket for Christian to put a picture of his nemesis Toto in and wear around his neck.

  • Dara: It’s hidden on the budget line as “beef,” but it’s cattle. Hundreds of thousands of cattle. For the necromantic sacrifices required to keep Helmut Marko alive on a race-to-race basis.

  • Tone: It's been a long, costly, and rigorous process, and we haven't seen the results until now, but it obviously has to be bending all of Max's hats.

  • Jess: More races = more miles for Helmut Marko's cryogenic pod to be transported.

Today’s question: In an alternate universe, both Mick Schumacher and Nico Hulkenberg were told they're not getting the Haas seat next year. Who's getting it instead? (Wrong answers only!)

Submit your answer here.

Photo credits: Kym Illman, Mark Sutton, Red Bull Racing, Max Verstappen, Ferrari, Valtteri Bottas, Tiffany Cromwell, Lily He, Natalie Pinkham, Naomi Schiff, Zhou Guanyu, Lewis Hamilton, Mercedes, IIsa Hernáez, Lando Norris, Kelly Piquet, Logan Sargeant.
Copyright © 2022 Engine Failure, All rights reserved.

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